Things I am afraid of.
Posted by joan
Hats off to Scoutie for talking about the whale thing. I mean it. Everyone who knows her knows she has a real and significant phobia about whales. Her insights about its larger implications were very grownup.
Scoutie also has a pretty dramatic fear of loud noises. I never knew the origins of the whale phobia but I was sitting right next to her when the loud noise phobia began.
It was August. A very hot afternoon in Southampton. Scout was about 3 or 4. She fell asleep en route to a circus. We had to wake her up in the parking lot. There were already tons of people and loud music. She was all crumpled and sweaty. Cute but crumpled and sweaty.
We cajoled her up and through the turnstyles. We were almost late (Scout no doubt had something to do with this. She seemed to have demonstrated a phobia of promptness at a very early age) but got there just as the show began.
It couldn’t have been five minutes before they roll a canon out into the middle of the ring. And then BBBOOOOMMM! And a guy comes flying out of the canon.  Everyone cheers.
Scout comes flying out of the tent. With her mothers flying after her.
That was the end of the circus for Scout.  There was no negotiation. We knew it was over. And based on who Scout had already become, we knew it would be a long time before she ever stepped foot into a circus tent again. And that loud noises would never be her friend.
To her credit, however, once she stopped screaming, she wanted to know more. Her innate curiosity shone through. And for the next 2 1/2 hours during our ride home, she repeated:
“Why’d they shoot that guy out the canon?”
Maybe I should get back to the title of this post and the picture.
I’m going to, over the next few posts, ponder things I am afraid of. Scout’s post inspired me.
So I’ll start with this picture. I am afraid of:
1) Bar mitzvah parties with photo booths
2) Boys who know so much about wrestling that they can create just the right pose for a picture at a bar mitzvah photo booth.
3) My son growing up.
